Please Do Not Feed the Fears

Dear Blog,

Today is my day off and day 2 of this challenge. I actually have some more energy which is very surprising to me. Are the meds working already? The Pharmacist said it will take a month to see results so perhaps the energy is mind over matter...who knows.

I needed to get out of the house so I decided to go downtown, find a coffee shop (not Starbucks) and do some blog therapy. After much effort trekking through the biting wind on Bloor Street to find a place that had a free table and an outlet, I'm here at...can you guess? Yep, the much dreaded Starbucks....argh!

Anyway, after chewing over the last blog topic, I decided to do something a little radical and embrace hunger today. No, I'm not fasting...I haven't reached that level yet...but I began to go longer with little amounts of food. After breakfast of mixed fresh berries, Mozzarella cheese, and a cup of hot water, I felt the usual panic begin to arise within me that I didn't eat enough but I am quite proud to announce that I rode the panic wave until it passed. Yes, it passed! I couldn't believe it! So I realized right then and there that the fear I experience is simply an illusion, and when ignored it slinks away like the confronted bully that it is.

I went 5 hours without food after breakfast (just a herbal tea) and I feel amazingly proud of myself. Since Starbucks doesn't carry gluten-free food, I ordered a 28g bag of plain popcorn and a banana. THIS IS LUNCH. As much as I think I need the package of almonds that I eyed at the counter a short while ago I will not buy it. I am panicking...oh yes am I ever panicking right now as I write this but I am choosing to ride the waves of fear crashing around in my head and I know it will go away.

Update: 2.5 hours after writing the above paragraph, the fear is gone and I have not eaten!